I'd like to say that for the twenty four hours of every day since I found out that Linda is pregnant, I have looked forward to the arrival of the baby - to becoming a father - to us becoming a family instead of a couple. For the most part, I have. I don't count the times I feel scared. Those moments are like boarding an airplane; a little part of me screams that I'm out of my mind and that it's all going to crash and burn, but the rest of me is excited, feeling like a little kid, myself. No, if I'm completely honest, there are those weak moments when I feel selfish, and I wonder if, after the baby comes, I'll have those moments, hours, and days that were just mine - the camping trips, the hikes, the summer afternoons on the deck. I stumbled on a quote yesterday that I'll keep in my mental pocket, taking it out whenever my self-centered side needs a slap to send it back into its corner:
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.
Joseph Campbell
34 days until baby.
Oh, Bill! Somehow, right now, I just smiled after reading your "34 days until baby". I remember when I passed my first due date by 2 weeks wondering, "How on earth could this baby have missed her birthday?" Finally, Mark made a tea on our midwife's advice and lo and behold, Hope listened. (Castor oil mixed with orange juice invited our second two children into the world.) The wonderful surprises and gifts that await you and your wife are indescribably magical. But still, be sure you have installed a lock on your bathroom door. The bathroom is a wonderful place to hide from a screaming child! A little self-centeredness can help keep you sane. You know how they have you put your mask on in the airplane first? Parenting feels like that sometimes. Be good to yourselves and your marriage first, and your child will be naturally happy. A.
ReplyDeleteRemember to:
ReplyDelete1. Always take time for yourself every day.
Your time might be alone or together, sometimes more, sometimes less, but always restorative.
2. Be flexible.
Nothing goes as planned with children; there will always be lots of juggling; and so much is unknown. Having a family is challenging and positively magical!