Monday, May 30, 2011


Yesterday, we went to a graduation party. It was the second of two family gatherings at which Violet showed the side to her self that, in all honesty, seems foreign – her unhappy side. On the phone and here in this blog, I tell everyone how good-natured she is at home and out on the town, but as soon as she’s surrounded by family, the corners of the lips go down, the inner ends of the eyebrows bunch up, and it’s all over except the screaming and the crying. The frustrating part is that Linda just brought her to an event at school; the hallways were mobbed with parents and kids, it was hot and loud, and Violet was the calm, Zen master in the middle. She just looked around, suffered serenely through the stares, the pokes, the oohs and ahhs, and she even doled out a few smiles. But put her in the arms of an aunt, an uncle, or her godfather, and she cries like she’s been stood up on prom night. Maybe it’s because at the school event, she was in her stroller and wasn’t being passed from person to person like she was at the family party. Maybe she needs her own space when so many people are around. I suppose we can try to keep her in her car seat at the next family event, but I’m sure we’ll end up offending someone, saying, “Sorry, she doesn’t like being held too much.” Someone will listen to those words and hear instead, “Sorry, we don’t want her to be held by YOU.”

190 days old

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